Anything that follows the words, “ I am…” is potentially very limiting because I am is both defining and confining. Saying I am declares, to yourself as well as others, your identity. When you hear yourself say, ”I am something” often enough, you internalize that condition. You think of and act in accord with how you’ve defined yourself.

You are not your job. Your livelihood shouldn’t define your personhood.                          Here are some better ways to describe how you make your living without tying your identity to your paycheck: I work as …;My job is…; I earn my living by…; I work for…; I run/manage/ work in a company that…

What’s key in all these examples is the very important shift in your language from I am- which equates with your identity, to I do- which describes an activity, and doesn’t necessarily define you.

By making this suitable but very powerful shift in your language, you open up tremendous opportunities in how you think of yourself- and the permission you give yourself to thin, feel and act beyond your professional designation.

Just as following the words, I am with a professional description is unnecessarily limiting, using I am before describing your emotional state also confines you.  When you say,” I am anegy,” you are in essence equating your state of being with one emotion. Saying, “I am frustrated/angry/upset” restricts you. Yourself-description converts all the multi-faceted complexity of you and reduces it to one narrow, highly limited description.

Rather than reducing the whole of yourself to one emotion, open up your perspective with a slight but important shift in language. Don’t say “I am furious!” Say, instead, “I am feeling frustrated with this situation.” Or, “Right now, I am feeling…” Or, “I am experiencing [whatever emotion you feel].”

This allows you to acknowledge and express your feelings, but you retain your sovereignty over your emotions. You experience them but are not defined by them.

WHIZ QUIZ

1. In which language was the Akbamama written?
2. Who is the second women to hold the position of India’n defence minister?
3. Where is the Jaldpana Wildlife Sanctuary situated?
4. What is the irrational fear of dogs called?
5. Name the Argentine doctor revolutionary who wrote The Motorcycle Diaries, describing his historic motorcycle expedition through South America.

ANSWER

1. Persian 2. Nirmala Sitharaman 3. West Bengal 4. Cynophobia 5. Emesto ‘Che’ Guevara